Law of Attraction?

I wonder if its really true that if I wanted to have something, 

as long as I kept thinking about it & do things that lead me towards it; I will get it eventually.

This is not working on me right now. 

I wanted to leave this place so much yet I'm still stuck here. 

Why is it so that I often don't get what I want? 

WHY!?

WHY!?

WHY!?

I know that my situation is getting serious. 

I even start hearing voices last month. 

Luckily, I didn't happen this month. 

I'm reaching to the limit of my emotional control & I'm going to breakdown anytime soon. 

I know. Because I just let my tears dropped in front of my sister & brother when I'm in the office. 

I'm so sicked of making up lies for I cried because I'm just feeling sad. 

I'm out of lies to tell when people saw me crying. 

My thoughts were so extreme that I wanted to just leave this place although I know I can't. 

Nobody can help me except changing my own thoughts. 

I know!

But I just can't control it sometimes. 

 July isn't my month. 

For the number of posts I post, 

the more I post,

the more depressed I go.

I'm so sorry, 

I didn't want my blog to be so sad.